Welcome to FidaDida's Blog!

Kisah seorang ibu tunggal sementara (Pengenalan)

2010-05-25T00:26:00.000-07:00

Sejak 6 mac 2010 aku mendapat status baru - Ibu Tunggal Sementara (ITS). Inilah cabaran apabila pasangan suami isteri sama-sama sambung belajar buat PhD. Tolong....jangan buat sebegini. kalau ye pun nak sambung belajar, biarlah 'sequential' jangan 'concurrent'. Ni la terminology yang aku belajar bila baca pasal 'mixed methods design'. Aku sudah mula lari dari tajuk ni... Inilah salah satu simptom bila jadi ITS ni...otak kelam kabut dan fikiran selalu tersasar. Bersabarlah ye.

Kalau ikutkan tarikh hari ini, telah genap dua bulan, 3 minggu dan 3 hari aku memegang status ITS ini. Hari-hari aku lalui dengan penuh hati-hati sebab aku memegang amanah menjaga dua hero yang selalu' tak boleh duduk diam'. Bayangkanlah. Si abang dan si adik lebih kurang sama je ragamnya walaupun kedua-duanya mempunyai personaliti yang berlainan. Yang pening, akulah. Hari-hari terpaksa melayan karenah mereka walaupun seharian mereka diletakkan di Family Day Care. Apa nak buat...

Banyak sangat peristiwa yang telah berlalu dan telahpun kuluahkan dalam facebook. Terpaksa buat macam tu supaya boleh terus bergerak ke depan. kalau tak, boleh meletup!!!

Alamak!!! Dah jam 5.35 petang. kena lari ambil anak dari Child care pulak. Haiyaa...abis mood nak berkarya. Lain kali je lah! At least ada jugak update blog ni...

Aku, si ITS itu..

Al-Fatihah buat Arwah Opah Esah Tersayang

2009-11-09T16:02:00.000-08:00

I was truly madly deeply sad last Friday because the only grandma that I have left...passed away on Friday, 6 November 2009, at 6.50 am (Malaysian time) in Kampung Batu 4, Segari Lumut, Perak. Good bye Opah.. May you rest in peace... I love you so much and I know that I'm going to miss you so much too. Semoga Allah permudahkan urusan Opah di alam kubur. Amin. Selamat berjumpa dengan Atuk Sudin. I know how much you missed him during Hari Raya last time... You kept on mentioning him name and informed us that Atuk Sudin was waiting for you somewhere..somehow....hmmm...

From your loving 'cucu' and two 'cicit' here in Melbourne, Australia.
I will upload some photos soon...A tribute to Opah Esah.

Happy Anniversary!

2009-07-08T22:29:00.000-07:00

Selamat Ulang Tahun Perkahwinan yang ke-4... hahaha

Suami masih satu
Anak dah dua

Wakaka...
-Fida-
9 July 2009

Pengorbanan?

2009-02-17T06:43:00.000-08:00

Entah mengapa hati terpanggil untuk meluahkan 'bicara hati' seorang ibu.
Ibu itu rasa bersalah
Ibu itu rasa berdosa
Ibu itu rasa tertekan
Kerana terperangkap dalam perjalanan yang suram

Sememangnya destinasi menjadi idaman
Tetapi liku-liku perjalanan memahat seribu satu perasaan
Fikirkan duniawi, fikirkan saham akhirat
Fikirkan research, anak jadi taruhan
Fikirkan anak, kerjaya jadi tak keruan
Fikirkan semua, tak tertanggung dek perasaan

Inikah pengorbanan?
Masa kualiti bersama anak jadi igauan
Curi-curi masa studi jadi kebiasaan
Nikmat keibuan jadi sandaran
Mengejar PhD yang masih kelam

Namun,
Ibu itu bukan sembarangan
Fikirannya teguh tempuhi cabaran
Susah senang ada kemanisan
Bekalannya doa dan keredhaan
Tawakkal lillahi Taala jadi seruan

Hai! Anak-anak sekalian
Maafkan lah ibu itu
Menuntut ilmu perlukan pengorbanan
Menguji keimanan dan kesabaran serta daya tahan
Setiap detik pasti ada ujian dan cabaran

Hai! Si ibu...
Teguhkan langkah teruskan perjalanan
Ambil masa refleksi pengalaman dan perasaan
Tenangkan hati ceriakan perasaan
Demi anak-anak yang dahagakan kasih sayang

Ya! Tuhan
Kurniakanlah kekuatan badan
Kurniakanlah ketajaman fikiran
Kurniakanlah kebijaksanaan
Permudahkanlah segala urusan
Jadi bekalan si ibu idaman
Dalam meneruskan perjalanan
Dan memahami erti pengorbanan

Nukilan Hati
Pena Hadifar
Midnight, 17Feb09

Good bye Unimelb...

2008-07-15T02:47:00.001-07:00

Happy birthday Hubby & Amanda (Mar08)

2008-07-15T02:08:00.000-07:00

Unbelievable again! My husband's birthday sama date dengan Amanda - 8 March - Suratan atau kebetulan? Whatever it is, we had a wonderful birthday picnic at Flemington Park (donno the real name of the park).
Hubby was reciting the 'doa' before the cake cutting ceremony. But Alesandro (?), Aunt K's son was already munching on something... Amanda pulak khusyuk dengar doa...agaknyalah.
The birthday girl (Amanda) and the birthday man (hubby).
One..two..three...BLOW!
At 1 year of age, Amanda shared one of her wonderful smiles...Check out her teeth..and hair clip.
Donno what he's smiling at...? We really enjoyed ourselves on that day..Sunday, 9 March 2008.

Happy birthday Adam & Achik (Feb08)

2008-07-15T00:11:00.000-07:00

Unbelievable! Achik and Adam share the same date for birthday - 7 Feb - So, when Adel decided to organise a birthday party for Adam, Achikpun join sekali. We were the first guests who arrived on that day (Sat, 9th feb. 2008). Here are among the other guests who were present:
Aunty Kamariah's children (beautiful daughters n son), Yuhanis, and some others (whom we didn't get the chance to meet.. :( ).
Adam was blowing his birthday candles...(more than his age).
Achik, the birthday girl, with her fans..Nabil and Amanda.
Check out these lovely girls..beruntung aunty K dapat anak comel2 belaka. Amanda KAGUM melihat lilin.

Overview of the passing moments (April - June)

2008-06-23T20:03:00.000-07:00

Today (Tuesday, 24th June 2008) I talked to Adel via phone. She said..what happen to your blog? Better don't blog la.. (in a jokingly manner). Haaiyaa..I do love blogging but gotalk (hate to mention this provider's name) is really driving me crazy.... Boleh jalan lah Gotalk... Boleh Blah la.. menyusahkan hidup customer je.... Because of this 'bodo' provider, I don't have a phone and internet connections at home for nearly 2 months. Again... Bodo punyer Gotalk!!!!

Anyway, here are some passing moments that I've recorded for future blog entries. Hopefully, I will have access to home internet soon...or else, "siap ko gotalk bodo...!!!"

18 April 2008 - Attended a research workshop at Clayton. Tak mendaftar lagi tapi dah buat macam uni sendiri...hahaha... Who cares... Giler ilmu lebih baik dari giler duit, betui kan?

Towards the End of April 2008 - we (my hubby and I but mostly my hubby la) were so busy looking for units/houses for rent in the areas of Clayton, Springvale, Noble Park, and Dandenong. Most of the house-hunting activities were carried out by my husband. Of course la.. I had my turn last year... remember? The tears, the stress, the emotional breakdown...They are all still fresh on my mind.. I hate house-hunting! We got one unit (nice and cosy) but we have to decline it because the starting date is too soon, i.e., on 18th April 2008. We can't afford to pay rents for two units at the same time... Rugi dalam AUD 1000 beb... Kes NAye tu.
25th April 2008 - ANZAC Day! and also a day that confirms..."I'm pregnant!". Donno what to feel..syukur ada, seram ada, takut ada, risau ada, happy ada, dan all other mixed feelins... but finally, "setiap sesuatu yang berlaku itu, ada hikmah di sebaliknya", Kami REDHA!

28th April 2008 - mendaftar kat Monash University for the first time but...I can't do my proper enrollment because my name and ID was set as an 'alumni' of Monash. Gilerr!!! Baru first time nak mendaftar dah dikategori sebagai Alumni. Apara.... anyway, it took me a week to settle this 'technical problem'.
2nd May 2008 - Got a villa unit at Noble Park. 3-bedroom unit with AUD230 per week (AUD996 per month). Mahal and over budget tapi...terpaksa ambil je sebab dah penat cari rumah. Ikutkan hati memang taknak unit tu tapi...kesian kat hubby. Pay 1 month rent and bond. I also attended a research workshop at my fac.. Now, I'm officially monash HDR students in the workshop and no longer.."penyibuk". kuang! kuang!
3rd May 2008 (Saturday) - A farewell trip to Highpoint Shopping Centre and Nabil's favourite playground near our unit in the morning and a visit to Hassan & Shifanas's house in Hoppers Crossing in the afternoon-evening.

We met Huda (their lastest addition to the family) for the first time. So cute....! I'll post a proper blog with pictures of Huda soon.

9th May 2008 - Pick up the keys for our newly rented unit. First time I viewed the uni...arghh... I said to my hubby, after the lease end, kita pindah lagi la.... (Betul ke?)10th May 2008 - Moving out and Moving in day. Got a funny story during this process but will save it for later. Haiya.. citer je la..
Si Minh (driver/owner of the truck/removal company) tu pi tunggu kat umah yang we all nak pindah bukan datang ke umah Footscray. Apara...simple information pun kadang kala orang boleh misunderstood... No wonder most psychologists agree that different people have different perceptions. Nasib baik Minh tak charge extra. We all jamu dia dgn kawannya makan meehoon goreng dan teh panas... Total cost: AUD260...duit...duit..
Later that day, we went to Halal Kebab shop at Yarra Man and belasah some turkish breads (I mintak satu je dan suruh potong 3 tapi minah Arab tu bagi 3 biji bread yg beso gedabak tu) and chicken kebab. Tak terlarat nak makan so tapau je coz..again..simple things/instruction can get mixed up/misunderstood....
It took us two weeks to settle down. Penat betoi bila pindah umah ni... Thanks to Achik for helping us out. You are a miracle! We spent some time to explore the nearby area. Fruits and Vegies market, springvale market (ala-ala Saigon market kat Footscaray), and the shops at Yarra Man.

21st May 2008 - My Birthday La... hmm... No specific celebration but I just cooked something 'special' for the family: Agar2 cocktail dan laksa penang. Hubby belanja makan fish n chips... jadi le. Nabil? just gimme a kiss.
1 June 2008 - First day of Winter in Melbourne.
2 June 2008 - Shopping sakan kat Dandy's Savers: 50% discount! Borong 2nd hand TV and tricycle for Nabil.
5 June 2008 - We (hubby and I) saw our 'future baby' for the first time....hope it's a girl. Pray for us k.

9 June 2008 - Nabil's immunisation shots. He got 4 shots at one time (LR arms and LR legs). Nangis dan siap tolak tangan nurse..tapi lepas cucuk je terus tak nangis coz nurse bagi dia lolly pop (chuppa chup!). First time dia 'belasah' chuppa chup! He's due for another shots in 2 months time.

The rest of June till 8 July 2008 - I will be so busy with Uni works/activities: Psychology Residential Week and Presentation, Winter's School, and MERC Conference. I will have 2 presentations: one on the 1st of July (presenting my PhD proposal) and another one on the 4th July (presenting some parts of my literature review). Do wish me luck k!

Hopefully the above overview of my passing moments help to answer the 'absence' of my blog entries since April 19, 2008.

Till next time.
Posted on 24 June 2008. I suppose to be reading the rest of Alexa's thesis but...gatai pulak tulis blog. Hmmm.... sabo je la.

Gelagat Nabil (part 3)

2008-04-19T21:23:00.001-07:00

Ahad, 20 April 2008 - Banyak lagi events yang belum post. ..Majlis Solat Jemaah dan Bacaan Yasin, Majlis Sambutan Hari Lahir, etc... Belum ada mood for posting those events...nantilah. I just love to share Nabil's stuffs..aksinya, ragamnya, gayanya,dan seribu satu macam lagi tentang dia...my love, my cute peacemaker, my strength, my inspiration, my heart and soul, and..of course my beloved son! Nabil tengah posing habis-habisan on the jogging track along 'Sungai tak tau nama' di Footscray Park. Dia sibuk dok atas jalan dan tunggu his mom ambil gambarnnya... he's so adorable!
Nabil on the pedestrian walk along Empire Street, Footscray. We went for a morning walk together and he just loved to see the birds...all kind of them...and started calling them "ka ka".
Nabil was getting ready for one of his "regular" morning walks. He normally begged me or his 'babah' for this walk. Sometimes, he brought his shoes and stood near the entrance door and started making 'muka kesian'.... adoi..tak sampai hati maa...sejuk pun keluar jugak walaupun sokojap. Ni lah muka kemenganan dia...
Nabil loves feeding the ducks at Footscray Park. Dah 3-4 kali dah we all gi kat Footscray Park. Tapi hanya dua kali je berkesempatan bagi itik makan. The first time was on 6 April 2008 (Sunday) at 8.30 am (the exact time was 7.30 am because we forgot about the end of daylight saving). Unfortunately, I forgot to bring my camera. The second time we fed the ducks was on the 13th April 2008. I'll post a different sketch for this duck-feeding day with a camera! The above pic was taken before we knew that we could feed the ducks..So, nabil loved watching the ducks and calling them 'ka ka'.
This is another enjoyable moment for Nabil - having his bath. Dia suka sangat berendam. Sebut mandi je, muka dia dah berseri-seri dan tak sabar2 nak buka nappy sendiri. Bila berendam, dia suka main bola, main simbah2 kat org nak mandikan dia...dan juga 'membebel' in his own language. Apa dia cakap, we all tak paham... That's all about 'gelagat nabil'.

"Thank you Nabil for bringing joy and happiness in my life. You are my life saviour!"
Love you always
Ibu.

Gelagat nabil (part 2)

2008-04-19T17:40:00.001-07:00

Ahad, 20 April 2008 - Tadi gi umah Adel jap. Syok borak dengan Amanda... terhibur hati. Lapang dada melihat aksi Amanda yang mesra alam... Kids are great creatures..they are just so wonderful and so lovely...and bubbly too...Nabil sedang serius memandu kereta di highpoint shopping centre.
Nabil sedang serius menonton TV. Cerita apa lagi...Hi5 la.
Nabil sedang serius menambat hati kucing...untuk diajak bermain.
Nabil sedang posing....dengan baju astronautnya.
Nabil sedang serius membaca buku "Handbook of Multicultural Counseling"...

Stay tuned...part 3 is coming...

Gelagat Nabil (part 1)

2008-04-19T16:50:00.000-07:00

Ahad 20 April 2008 - The only thing yang boleh menghilangkan stress dan menenangkan jiwa ialah Nabil. He is the one person that I can talk to, play with, and be with. I love him unconditionally. Without him, I'll not be in this 'misery trap': The more I tried...the harder the struggle.... Just wait and see the final episode.

Nabil with his macho walk. The good thing about this walk is that..he is walking towards ME...his mommy.
Nabil trying to pay attention to adults' chat... He's so comel walaupun mencangkung macam orang nak *you know what*.
Nabil tersenyum lebar...during one hot day! (baju seksi tu..)
Nabil really enjoying himself playing with a swing... Buai laju..laaajuuuu....sampai pucuk sena..apa dalam baju..sekuntum bunga cina...
Aha!!! Gotcha! Nabil really enjoys chocolate.. He's biting a big Easter Egg Choc. Yummy!

Finally....

2008-04-10T20:29:00.000-07:00

After waiting...waiting...waiting...emailing..emailing...calling up..calling up...crying.. 'pening'.. stress.. tension... muak... bosan... Finally I got the news that my application to transfer my candidature from Melbourne Uni to Monash Uni has been approved by UM and also KPT. However, I still have to wait...wait...wait some more...stress... tension... bosan... follow-up... again..follow-up..making calls even though my house phone line rosak.. call kat public phone tepi jalan... talk to them.. beg them.. ask for their kindness to hurry up in preparing the DOCUMENTS to ACT!!

Verbal approval is nothing... I need the documents.. I need them urgently so that I can take the necessary actions...

Do I have to wait and suffer some more???

History of 'Suffering Moments'
26 Oct 2007 - enrolled at UNIMELB + 1st supervisory meeting: got the funny feeling already... expectations clashes... I don't like the supervision arrangement..but, no worries..tak cuba tak tau kan?
22 Nov 2007 - 2nd sup meeting: The thinking part started...have to change the proposal topic?
23 Nov 2007 - 2nd sup meeting (part 2): introduced to a new perspective of research..blurr!
14 Dec 2007 - 3rd sup meeting: Eureka! I think I got the topic I need...
18 Dec 2007 - 4th sup meeting: Yep! definitely have to change my initial proposal topic. No more 'mental health literacy', Now it is multicultural counseling....counseling??? Oo...Oo... Tried 'co-supervision across institutions'..... FAIL
4 Jan 2008 - " A Cry for HELP" started..emailing people in UM for help....sadly, no replies.. :(
25 January 2008 - 5th sup meeting: The first TRIO meeting ever took place...and the results? DISASTER. So many conflicting issues..so much tensions among the three. Did I sense a political tension? Hmm... Oo..Oo.. my 'fight or flight' system was activated... Should I stay? Should I find a better alternative to sort this out? I went to seek help and advice from Dr Ali from MSD...hmm... I talked to Jaja for some advice on the procedures for changing uni..hmm. TOUGH!
* start emailing my HOD and my Dean...lodging my 'informal' request...
*start explaining and re-explaining...
* start working on securing a place at MOnash...getting a supervisor..etc...

15 Feb 2008: 6th sup meeting: The searching for and reading of the 'relevant' literature took place.. TOUGHER! I think I got the research question...but...
22 Feb 2008: 7th sup meeting: Given 2 tasks to accomplish..HARD..really HARD esp. when I feel the research topic is still too broad.. How to work on the design if I'm still blurr?
* Got an Offer from Monash on 22 Feb?
26 Feb 2008: 8th sup meeting: Serious discussion about supervision took place...
27 Feb 2007: Submit formal application to UM via fax and email
4 April 2008 - Got spproval from BSM, UM
11 April 2008 - Got approval from KPT...

"Ya Allah, permudahkanlah urusanku di dunia dan juga di akhirat, AMIN"

Faculty Orientation at Monash

2008-04-10T18:41:00.000-07:00

Friday, 28 March 2008 - I attended the "Faculty of education Research Students Orientation" at Room G23, Building 6, Education Faculty, Clayton Campus. I was invited even though I was not an official student of Monash yet! So, I felt so welcomed in their research community network. The staffs and the HDR students were so friendly and I felt so 'at home'. The programs were all very useful and I wrote back to the organising committee to thank them personally and to encourage them to keep up the good work. I was amazed with the support services provided for HDR students! Not only they are FOC but they are very relevant to me as a person as well as as a professional. The staff treated HDR students as their colleague with so much respect and care for each other. I'm glad I took the trouble to change Uni! The hard work shall pay off.

From Footscray station, I had to go to Flinders St station and from there took a Pakenham train to Hunting dale station. So, this is the station. From here, I had to take a bus to Monash Clayton campus.
Another thing that I like about Monash is the way diversity and multicultural issues are addressed among the students and staffs. They understand our religious needs. So, the Uni has provided a religious centre for all religious people to have a specific place to pray. I like this facility so much because I know there's always a safe, clean, and private place for me to pray whenever I want to. Unlike in my current uni..hmmm ...I umph...I....I felt so 'neglected' and so 'alienated' by their so called support system. I always had to rush back home in order to pray. This experience of 'rushing here rushing there' really get into my nerve.. I felt so stressed up!
So, this is it, the religious centre. Although it is a shared building, it is still ok because there is a separate place for a muslimah with a proper place to take wuduk and a 'proper' toilet. Hmm....
Along the way to the religious centre, I managed to get a few shots. This is one of them.
Besides the above, I also felt so thankful about the food they provided for the students during the orientation. They provided HALAL food about 3/4 of the total food and refreshment available for us! They even separated the HALAL food plates from the non-HALAL one by a row of can/bottle drinks.. What a culturally sensitive gesture. Hmm...I like it! Last but not least, Mayur, the HDR officer, asked me to bring a plate of sandwiches back home...I'm not even their student but I get the priviledge to bring back home some food... What more can you ask for???

Nabil's favourite spot

2008-04-10T18:00:00.001-07:00

Jumaat, 11 April 2008- lama betul tak post cerita ceriti. Kurang masa lapang untuk berkarya kreatif. Kepala pulak asyik memikir tentang proposal..hmmm..STOP! Ok, ni nak kongsi cerita tentang Taman permainan kanak-kanak kegemaran nabil. Taman ni dekat je dengan unit we all. First time jejak kaki ke Tmn ini ialah pada 31 Jan 2008 (sehari sebelum Ayah Nabil sampai Melbourne). Tu pun achik yang sibuk ajak...tapi, memang berbaloi... Nabil really loves it.
Sejak hari bersejarah itu, boleh dikatakan setiap minggu pasti kan ke Taman ini: bersih, selamat, dan tidak sesak..tempatnya juga amat strategik iaitu 'on the way to ALDI'. Ni salah satu game spot nabil.
"Hmmm..bilalah ibu dengan achik nak bawa Nabil ke Taman ni lagi". nabil buat muka kesian...
Achik rajin melayan nabil main gelungsur. Whowwiiiii...Nabil enjoy sakan.
Nabil dan ibu...posing je la..buat kenang-kenangan..nanti kalau pindah ke rumah lain tak pasti boleh datang lagi...Ok, that's all about Nabil's favourite spot...actually, one of his favourite spots in Melbourne!

What 'Good Friday Day' means to Us

2008-03-25T20:15:00.000-07:00

Jumaat, 20hb Mac 2008 - ni la hari cuti umum kat sini. We all gi Footscray Park for the first time. We went there at around 9 a.m. At first, we thought of having our breakfast over there. Pastu malas lak nak angkut byk brg. So, makan dulu then we all gi. Thumb's up! Memang best dan cantik taman ni.. Nabil paling happy sebab dia syok kejar itik dan burung...

Nabil memang enjoy sakan dan tak mahu dipimpin. Bila penat, dia akan dok atas jalan...
Ni pun cantik gak sebab boleh nampak city of melbourne kat belakang...
"Ka..Ka.." Ni la gelaran yang Nabil beri kat itik dan burung yang ada kat Taman ni... Tak puas dia dok menengok beburung kat sini.
Kalau tak dipegang tangannya, dia memang akan lompat masuk kolam... sabo je la.

What 'Good Friday Day' means to Us (cont.)

2008-03-25T02:18:00.003-07:00

Friday, 20th March 08 - Our next agenda was heading south to Hassan's n Shifanas's place for a BBQ! It was such a wonderful and delicious day for us because Bro Hassan was an expert BBQ chef!
We had grilled corn, vegie satay, tandoori sausage, chicken sausages, chicken wings, meat kebab, and crispy grilled onions...hmmm...every single item was so delicious and finger-licking-good! Seriously!
Besides all the meat/chicken stuff, we had mixed vegies salad too specially made by Shifanas.
Shifanas was so busy preparing food for everybody. We were the early birds because we were there at about 3.30 pm and the other guests (Thameema's extended family) arrived at about 8.00 pm. So, we ate and ate and chatted, and ate again. It was a day to remember.
At last, we had to go because we didn't want to get lost finding the way back. I drove to Hassan's place without a map and hubby had to drive back home with the same hunch feeling. Luckily, the trip back home was faster and easier because we decided to try the freeway... Nabil? He's the happiest kid on the day. He made my Good Friday the most meaningful and enjoyable one.

World Peace

2008-03-14T10:21:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, 14 Friday 2008 (2.15 - 4.00pm), I attended a talk on "Culture and Conflict: Culture of war, Culture of Peace" by Anthony J. Marsella. The talk was so inspiring and the speaker was so bloody good.

The talk: The talk covers a wide range of issues in relation of two conflicting cultures: the culture of war versus the culture of peace. It's such an eye-opening talk because you suddenly realized that war is a man-made event. War is planned by an evil person; a person who is profit-lover, greedy, inhumane, and care nothing about others. War can be triggered by so many factors even as silly as something you can't possibly imagine! However, the most devastating cost of war is the consequences...deaths, suffering, cultural destruction, economic loss, etc.... People know about this thing and yet they still pursuing war. These people don't have a scope for imagination at all, or else they wouldn't even think about war! Enough about war stuffs, let begin a new chapter in life by focusing on the culture of peace. It is possible to have and build this culture. In fact, there are also some possible steps towards creating a culture of peace. One that strikes me deeply is 'apologizing'. Say "I'm sorry for the things that happen". As simple as this is still a problem to some people. Sometimes, in a human relationship, saying sorry is seen as 'weakness' even though there's no harm at all in doing so. It's unthinkable and i feel sorry for those people who do not know the value of saying sorry. Pity them...

The speaker: He's a good looking fella eventhough he's in his 60s.. His face has such a soothing effect on anybody. He speaks based on his experience, cultural background and invaluable personal and professional experience that contribute to his current role as a peacemaker. He even cried during his talk when he shared his working experience with rape victims, homeless children, and poor people in some countries. He is such a good role model for all other peacemakers...his personality, his style, and his substance... I wish everybody can attend his lecture and get to know him in person...

The lesson:
I learnt a lot of things from this lecture because deep down I want to be a peacemaker too. I reflected every invaluable lesson I got and I started implemented it right away... I believe people can change if they want to change and there's a system of support around her/him. Only an egoist or 'buta hati' and 'buta minda' who do not want to change or do not want to improve his behaviour and relationhip with others. To these people...I feel sorry for you because you are missing the wonderful part in life.

-Fida D-
"Thank you for finding myself in you, I hope you can find yourself in me"

Reality Bites!

2008-03-12T22:27:00.000-07:00

Sometimes…

Sometimes, you feel that you have somebody to talk to

Somebody to share your thoughts and feelings

Somebody to share your sorrows and difficulties

Somebody who is going to provide a shoulder to cry on

When you are at a crossroad between ‘mental block’ and ‘emotional eruption’

In this so-called PhD journey

Unfortunately, it is all a ‘dream’, a ‘fantasy’, and a never-ending-hope

There is nobody! There is no one! There is no soul at all that can have that powerful emphatic character!

Not your so called loved one!

Not your so called partner in life!

Not your so called best friend!

Only HIM…Allah the Al-Mighty

He listens to your talks

He takes notes of your thoughts and feelings

He acknowledges your sorrows and difficulties

In fact, He always there when you need Him

During bad times or good times

He’s there and always be there for you

Thank you Allah for your love…

Thank you Allah for your blessings…

You are..afterall, my one and only true love!

-Fida D-

“Ya Allah, hanya Engkau yang Maha Mengetahui segala sesuatu”

“Hanya diriMu ku serahkan segala-galanya”

“Ku mohon petunjukMu”

Blogger! Here I come...

2008-03-11T22:18:00.000-07:00

Welcome! Welcome to the world of bloggers! As a newcomer, I feel a bit 'out-dated' with this new technology. Why didn't I use this 'fancy' stuff before? Hmmm.. I did have a blog before but I never bother to use it. I just didn't have the time to do it.

Now? Now is the right time because I'm about to embark in a challenging road in my PhD journey. There's going to be many exciting and not-so-exciting events in my life. So, here I am... starting my new post as a blogger. I'll make sure that my PhD journey is not going to be a lonely one. I have my inspiration, i.e., my darling Nabil with me. It's gonna be an epoch of my life. Stay tuned!

-Fida D-
"Ibu saaaayaaaannngggg Nabil"

Angkasawan negara terkini...Mister Nabil

2008-03-11T19:33:00.000-07:00

Balik je dari Uni hubby bagitau yang dia telah terjumpa dengan angkasawan negara yang paling muda di dunia. Wahh!!! Ini berita gempak ni. Siapa? Anak siapa? Asal mana? Bagaimana agaknya rupanya? Pelbagai soalan timbul di benak fikiranku.

Rupa-rupanya....sabo je la...

-Fida-
"Ibu loves you anyway...my little astronaut"